This weekend I’m in the wedding of one of my best friends. This girl is straight awesome and I love her to pieces so of course I’m super happy and excited for her. They’re actually doing something a little nontraditional and having their wedding on a Friday. It got me thinking about how wedding traditions have changed and continue to change over the years. There are some traditional aspects of weddings that I really like and appreciate. For example, I couldn’t have imagined my wedding without my father giving me away, or without groomsmen and bridesmaids. At the same time, I also love when people make their wedding truly their own and leave out traditions that don’t suit them, or better yet, make their own traditions! These are some of the typical wedding day traditions we skipped.
featured image by Front Room Photography
Wearing a veil
The original history of the wedding veil is that it was to ward away “evil spirits” that would surely haunt a young bride, full of purity and virtue. I personally have just never been a fan of veils. I especially am not a fan of having my face covered up as I walk down the isle. Like, heck no! I put all this time and money into looking good for this day, I don’t want any of it covered up! I briefly toyed around with the idea of wearing a veil that was really short and was never over my face but rather just kind of pinned back in my hair. Ultimately I decided against it and went sans veil. My dress was really form fitting (and I paid good money for it) so the thought of anything hiding my dress was not something I was interested in.
Not seeing each other before the ceremony
Casey and I got married in the dead of winter (January 7th) in Wisconsin. It was cold and our ceremony was at 4:30pm and it was already starting to get dark outside. Taking pictures after the ceremony really wouldn’t have been a good option. We really decided to do a first look purely because of the picture situation. We did our first look and then did all our pictures with the wedding party and family before the wedding. I was really on the fence about it, but it ended up being one of my favorite parts of the entire day, and I completely recommend it to other brides. Our first look was literally the only time we were completely alone the entire day.
Bouquet and garter toss
I literally hate both of these traditions so much. First of all, the garter toss. Am I the only one who literally cringes when I’m at weddings and I see the groom go up the brides dress and pull off the garter with his teeth? I get visibly uncomfortable.
The garter tradition originated as a way to prove that the bride and groom had consummated their marriage. The groom would literally open the door of the bridal chamber and toss the garter out as proof the consummation was complete. Um, no thank you.
The bouquet toss was meant to symbolize good luck “romantically” for all the other women out there who weren’t “lucky enough” to be married yet. Pah-lease, it’s 2017. A woman don’t need no man to be considered fulfilled, worthy, or lucky. *snaps fingers*
Walking down the aisle to Wagner’s “Bridal Chorus”
This song literally sounds like a death march to me. I have never liked it. I walked down the isle to Marry Me by Train and it was perfect.
Bridesmaids wearing matching dresses
I let my bridesmaids pick whatever style of dress they wanted. My only prerequisite was that it be some shade of champagne. I loved each of their dresses so much and I loved how they all looked as a group in pictures.
Having a cake topper
I’m not a big cake person and I really didn’t even want a cake, but Case loves cake so we went with it. We didn’t however have a grooms cake or a cake topper. I wanted something simple and cake toppers are typically gaudy looking in my opinion, unless you spend a lot of money to get a custom made one. In the end, it just wasn’t something I wanted to spend money on.
Clinking glasses to kiss
This tradition has always just been weird to me. We made an announcement at the reception saying glass clicking for kisses was not something we were doing. We did however have a substitute, and put out a jar at our head table for donations to our local pet shelter. When someone donated we kissed. By the end of the night we had raised over $400.
Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.
I have no real reason why I didn’t do this one other than it’s just kind of meh to me. I don’t hate it but I really just don’t love it either.